i have been blogging & blogging..ohhh myyy....
guess i really need to say out my feelings then i will feel better.
i am falling sick. goanna have fever real soon.
feel so weird. feeling hot + cold =?? *sighs-
just read your blog. great. you're loving someone now.
hah. shld i be sad? or happy for you instead? i dunnoe.
oh gawd. i realise whenever i wan to improve things,
or make it better, it will never ever succeed.
actually asked sis to buy a packet of nasi lemak for me. cos of you.
wanted to go down to "visit" you,
give you a beautiful surprise and
give you tt packet of lunch w all the food tt you wanted.
all that you've ordered before, i rmb clearly.
hah. but you noe wad?? before i can even get down to ur place,
you're out. gg to tp. how much i wanted to kill myself for it.
didnt noe where to head to. loitering aimlessly.
all tt i've planned. thought it will turn out smoothly.
but, *flop*. there it goes down the drain.
i dunno if you knew abt it. guihe say she told you.
you dun seem to show a single care abt it. sighs.
i felt so helpless. felt totally drained out. felt so lost.
wanted to just break down & cry out all that i have kept inside.
but i cant. i was in public. i controlled.
i cant believe wad i am doing & planning all these.
it has been two days. TWO days & i'm already going crazy.
is this how things is goanna turn out??
is this what we both expect it to be?? to me, i dont.
but to you, i dunno. i seriously dont.
i dont know what you're thinking abt. tell me will you?
haiss...i am really going crazy to my highest level.
real crazy..on thurs i will be much much worst..
guihe knows why..she will join me too.
i love you babe. thanks for being there. (:

*baby, you told me before its true.
its a reality & no longer a dream.
you said it will work out.
but i just dunnoe wads wrong.
you just dun seem to care like before.
i miss you.